But Of Course

But Of Course!

‘But of course!’, said the veiled terrorist,

Don’t you mistake me for a nihilist,

I work by the book, and what God does propose,

I listen, follow, blast, and dispose!

This time around, on the cards is something similar,

If you’re amongst the body count, well, all the more spectacular!

‘But of course!’, said the smiling minister,

We too have plans for the sinister.

But this time around, the plan was wrong,

They fooled us all, and we played along.

Next time you’ll see the plan get bigger and better,

We’ll catch them all, hook line and sinker!

‘But of course!’, said the leader, I too am tough,

And I will proclaim with fury; ‘we’ve had enough’,

But this time around, other pressures force,

And obligations arise, and veer me off course,

Just once more, let me sound like jelly,

I’ll be firm next time, just wait and see!

'But of course!' said the policeman,

I’m perennially prepared for action,

They say I’m stern, agile and dashing,

My cherubic convexity notwithstanding.

But when disaster struck, I was off duty,

So it really isn’t my fault, blame him, not me!

'But of course!' said the citizen,

I won’t let any such atrocities happen,

For scandals I expose, and leaders I denounce,

With startling venom their misdeeds I announce,

If an allegation was a penny, and a blame was a pound,

Wouldn’t millionaires in every Indian street be found?

'But of course!', said all of them in chorus,

We’re a good team, we forecast and we focus,

We plan and we execute, and we in virtue we outclass.

So blame the system not us, why are you so biased?

We have more plans to make, and duties to tend,

And the ravages of bygone disasters to mend!

Of all things in this country senseless and inane,

Of all things corrupt, rotten and profane,

Is the word system, and the use of it in vain,

As if it’s an entity, like the weather to transform,

From good to bad on its own, to fail and perform.

The system won’t change, so get ready for the next bomb!

So Like Us

People, things, and in general, circumstances never change. I realized this after watching the horror and drama unfold in my city over the past week. I say this , because I have also realized the following things: (Not a word below is false)

IT IS...

1. So like the terrorists to strike again. Trust them to never let a dull moment go by.

2. So like the metal detectors and other security measures to be completely redundant and useless when they were needed the most.

3. So like our system, to arm the railway police with merely Lathis, as a consequence of which they were among the first to run away when the carnage at CST station began.

4. So like our system again, to have NSGs only in Delhi.

5. So like our system to have the plane to carry them stationed in Chandigarh at that time, and so like that plane to need refueling at that moment, all of which resulted in a delay of 10 hours between the terrorist strike and the NSG operation commencement.

6. So like our politicians to pounce on the tragedy and play a game of oneupmanship. It is so like the BJP to allege now, and so like the Congress to refute.

7. So like our intelligence to have slept over a bulk of information that it had received over the past few months, pointing to exactly this kind of attack.

8. So like RR Patil, Mah Dty CM, to say "Small things like this tend to happen in big cities like ours. They had planned to kill at least 5000, so by those standards, we did pretty well." to the press.

9. So like his office to call and plead with the media not to broadcast that clip.

10. So like our media to ensure that was the first thing they broadcasted in glowing neon "BREAKING NEWS: RR PATIL: says..." font.

11. So like Pakistan to act all surprised and shocked, and sport a "Who Dunnit?" attitude. Yeah right. You bastards.

12. So like Manmohan Singh to sound like an economist even while delivering a speech to the world immediately after the attacks.

13. So like the Congress to take purely reactionary measures now, and sack incompetent fools. Like they had to wait for so long , and for such a failure to gauge the competence levels of their officers.

14. So like the NSG commandos to quietly finish the job and leave with minimum fuss. It is modesty that reveals greatness.

15. So like our system once again, to treat the families of those killed in the Taj/Oberoi with utmost respect, and have senior officers escort them to the morgue. At the same time, the kith and kin of those dead on the CST platform had to wait, or run from pillar to post for close to 48 hours for a chance to see their dead.

16. So like the media to have a field day and bring us live coverage of the gunfight. Like it were a cricket match.

17. So like the abysmal state of the coast guard to be discovered now. Now.

18. So like us to keep saying crap like 'spirit of the city' and 'resilient Mumbai'. Resilient my butt. You and I could be amongst the mangled bodies shown on television next time.

19. So like the media to ape the west in this hour of grief too, by labeling that day as "India's 9/11". It is one thing to call our film industry Bollywood. But to call 26th Nov "India's 9/11"? Grow up guys.

20. So like Raj Thakeray to do a disappearing act now. MNS commandos to the rescue anyone?

21. So like us to realize, in hindsight again, how petty his politics of North Indian v/s Marathi manoos really is.

22. So like them, no doubt to prepare for another strike.

23. So like us to be engrossed in the blame game again.

24. So like life in India to go on as always.